One side effect of travelling long distances with a pervert like Byron is that I make up bullshit songs to while away the journey. Mostly they disappear into obscurity but on Monday night, after a bottle of wine that my girlfriend didn't drink, my enthusiasm for the memory one song in particular overwhelmed me and I decided to bring it into the world in a more concrete form. It started, originally, as a sprightly rock'n'roll number but sadly my guitar skills weren't up to that so we've ended up with the bastard child of "Hotel California" and "Do you f**k on first dates".
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